#65

Assalamualaikum everyone. 

Hoping every each you are in the pink of health. It's still in Syawal, so I wish Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir Batin.

I believe this post is very emotional for me. 

The thing that makes me afraid finally happens. 
The thing that I always wanted to forget and try to fix it thousand times.

Just a normal day, where I always never forget to tell him that I love him, finally ruins everything. 
I have no idea where my courage came from, but I finally said " Can we split? Can we have our own life? I love you but it seems you not giving the same reaction recently. I mean not recently, a few months I believe."

And I am not surprised, he agreed. As he wanted, maybe.

Honestly, deep down inside my tiny heart, I'm asking myself. Like a thousand times. 
Again.
Thousand times.

"I've never stopped loving you."
"I've never doubted loving you."
"I've never agreed that people talking bad things about you."

But, it's starting to happen when you said that you didn't know if it's love.

So what's all this about?

Allah, is this a sign from you?

Or maybe, God wants me to remember that loving human is not lasting to the end.
He wants me to keep loving Him.
Allah, I'm so sorry. I will never do it again. InsyaAllah.
Maybe this whole thing triggered me to change better.
:-) Thank you Allah, syukur.